How you would like to die?

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When asked, how he would like to die, the man told :
" I would like to die just like my grandfather did, peacefully in his sleep, not screaming or yelling like the passengers in the car he was driving"

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Drunkard

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A drunkard, who was fully drunk, picking up an empty bottle from the bottles kept in front of him,  said -
" You are the one, because of whom my wife left me" and then he broke it throwing it on the ground.
Then he picked up the second empty bottle -
" You are the one who spoiled my house" and he throw it angrily on the ground.
Picking up the third bottle he said -
" You are the one who spoiled my whole life" he broke this one too.
Lastly he picked up the last bottle, which one was still full,
" You don't have to worry ... you are not at all at fault... on the other after this much of misery ... you are the one who is going to give me a support" he opened it and started to drink.

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New Cell Phone

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A lady buys a new Cell phone.
To surprise her husband
She goes to the Kitchen, and ....  calls her husband...
"HI DARLING"
He says "Call You Later Dear ... The devil Is in kitchen"

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